Joy is what you can now try to counter alarm
Anti-crisis quarantine child science, the next universal human challenge, and training skills to quickly adapt to changing reality. Of course, after such a crown crisis, the world and we will change dramatically in it. I’m already interested to see what all this will result in, and what we will become. I have a hypothesis – if at the manifested level, in external contacts, we are forced to distance ourselves, then perhaps the time has come for greater intimacy? Greater care for each other?
To be afraid is normal. It is not normal to not be afraid at all when there is a real threat. But when we are afraid, we commit a lot of erratic illogical actions. It would be great to write a list of what is important to do. Not just reposting or printing a picture, but yourself – with your hands, you can write or draw your list with your children. And your plan of action. This will help to structure thoughts and return to the body. In the list it is important to describe the plan – what are we doing now. What we do in case of illness. To whom we call, whom we call. A list of hot phones is generally a useful thing.
It is no coincidence that fire safety rules are taught, posters are drawn, and skills are reinforced – at the moment of real danger, when the brain decides to “beat”, “freeze” or “run”, mechanical memory must turn on. Or there must be external specific information that ” stabilizes” us.
- I am canceling the seminars of the coming week – in groups, there are many pregnant and nursing families, many students from other cities. This crisis will make me evolve and create online formats. I am sure that many will revise the forms of their implementation. Probably the right time.
- Children from today in quarantine. It is important for them to explain what is happening and why. For example: “Now many people in different countries are sick. Remember, when we were sick, in order not to infect others and recover faster, we stayed at home. And did not even go to anyone’s birthday. And in the movies. To prevent the virus from spreading, so that people get less sick, especially so that children do not get sick, they decided to temporarily close schools and kindergartens. To take care of you. We are safe. You will be at home and we will figure out what to do these days.”
A familiar child asked me today: “Aunt of the Light, have we been punished? All children behaving badly? Mom doesn’t know where to put me.” This background – “because of my problems” – is not very good at all. It is important for a child to know that he is not to blame. We don’t even know what children come up with and “finish off” themselves. And therefore, the more information from us, the less anxiety.
- I ’m thinking about how it would be possible to organize youth in our house to take care of elderly neighbors. It is possible to bring them food – so that those who are ” at-risk” do not crowd in stores and do not drive around the city.
- Perhaps the same grandparents could at least half an hour to spend with their children (if there is no one who could help, in the presence of parents and while in Ukraine there are no confirmed cases of infection).
- In our house, there are many families with children of about the same age. And x mothers are friends, family, familiar. They decided to unite and take turns gathering two or three children each – this will slightly relieve the burden, given the opportunity for at least some inclusion in the work. As long as there is no confirmed information about the virus in Ukraine – it is safe if the situation changes – it will be important to observe strict individual quarantine.
- Time Spending, I will write separately about what you can do with the kids during the quarantine. How, using the time you spend together, to work, for example, with the fear of the dark. Well, I’ll write about the games separately. At the same time, parents need to remember – especially in times of alarm – that it is important to reserve the right to their own time, their own space. Children’s useful to know that my mother is now 5, 10, 15 minutes to care for themselves, the time when my mother ” in the house. ” So the child learns to respect his own space. Learning that you can take care of yourself. Adults who are always with children experience tremendous sensory overload. Our nervous system has a limit on communication. If we do not take a break – consciously, with respect for ourselves – then we will be tormented by guilty feelings because we fell on a child. Children (even babies) are definitely not needed in full contact 24 hours a day.
- Once upon a time, many years ago, I studied at a trauma therapy course. At that time, I was surprised at how persistently teachers from Germany and Switzerland offered us practice at the beginning of the sessions: “engage in joy”. For at least half an hour we remembered or invented something that makes us feel happy. This is to create a background inside that helps withstand stress. Joy is what you can now try to contrast with anxiety. No matter how difficult, it is important not to lose the sense of taste in life. This will be our “immunity.” The phrase “I choose life” is not just a phrase. This is our choice.
- Support, it is important to know that in a time of crisis, there are those to whom we can but rely on. Perhaps we can become a support for those who are now more anxious. I hope there are those nearby who you can lean on. Any crisis is the time of ” we”.